autumn news

this is the first
autumn morning
dew drops hanging
delivering the face
of one so dear
clearly pictured
in the chandeliers
swinging on branches

this morning breeze, she
whispered to my ears
things that scratched
my heart, she
engraved a deep bleeding mark
telling me clear:

~as clear as crystals
hanging
on the green leaves
ready to leave
this first autumn morning ~

.....'his heart belongs to
the flying leaves.....'

a thorny dream

eyes closed,
tears mingled
with the flying dust
into a ball of muddy trust

a thorny dream

a gruesome day

a gruesome day, today
i was dragged down from my bed
before my eyes opened.
with heavy head
 i was inundated 
in the wicked cold water tub
naked, unable to fight
goose bumps shrouded my blue skin
from head to toe

and before i managed to gather my soul
my mouth was stuffed, with
porridge tasting of paper

that slimy thick white grains
attacked my tongue
and ambushed my throat
with no mercy
like hot water ran down a pipe,
flushed everything on its way.
i forced to swallow that puke like meal
for not a single grain was allowed
to be left out

apparently, 
the torture was just begun
i was taken to a place i detested most
the smell of 'pine scent' liquid
made me puke even more
it reminded me of aliens' blood
green, slimy
glow in the dark thing

i intended to run
i knew i couldn't
desperately i cried,
nobody came to help
they tied me instead
like a nasty villain
i was treated.

on that cold room
seated on a horrible stool
i sensed the execution chair!!!
i shouted in fear
they shut my mouth up
and knocked me down 

as the heavy clouds got darker
and gave birth to horenduous rain
the bulb in this room
started to sway
right left, left right
that hanging pendulum
hypnotized the time
mocking me and
added the tense
i felt in my chest

my heart pounded so hard
till you heard miles away from here
like "whalt whitman's beat of drums"
it would come to you
a nightmare i gave as a free gift
bum bum bum

(clock stopped ticking
a respect to the sound in my chest)

hands and legs tied,
they stabbed me
injected  haft-dead creatures
into my vein
they made them swim
in my blood
traveled through my body

those monsters,

not one, but thousand of them
invaded and stayed
in me for a time
i couldn't tell
they took control of me
i had no choice, had i...?
but to surrender
to them,
i was officially  inhabited
by aliens and monsters.

not one,
but thousands of them

today, in the gruesome day…



*  vaccination day in the eyes of a kid

under the old meranti

 under the old meranti*
a young boy sat, weary
as his tears thicken to sorrow
he casted a quest of tomorrow

my dad took my girl
my mom slept with her dad
pride no longer lingered
i couldn't even see what's near
so, why should this ragged soul be here?

why not hang it on the neck of the old meranti?
to decorate the cold gray grave
to be written on the dead sign
of the dark peaceful coffin
the place where i could hide
from the light and from what might

old meranti, bow to me now
for i need to hurry
before my neighbors wake and see
all that happened in me
and throwing stones
judging me
for being poorly,
me...


*meranti= tropical tree, strong and big.        

storm in my pot

he brewed the storm

in my coffee pot

it spun like a top

and spilled what's inside,

out.... 

its a love poem, after all

i thought i began to write phrases

of red roses and purple haze

two hearts in one place

you called it love in a velvet case

young and fresh

as mint and lemon oil

burnt in an aromatic pot

filled up the air

with  the pleasant scent of love

you and i

side by side

perfectly abreast

they asked,

love at  the first sight?

no,

it just happened

at the last sight,

last night, to be precise…

i thought,

it was a blasted grace

a new phase for us to gaze

to write new phrases

phrases of love,

i supposed…

i thought,

it was love

problems wouldn’t be counted

no!!

not yet…

after  all, its a  love poem

was it not?

sorry, no lights

i stitch the moon beams

with my aching veins

and drag the gleams

with the pleated reins

i keep them beneath my feet

under the crackling beat

of those darkest lights...

under the colorless shadows 

of the time

moonless nights
sleepless brides
forgive me
for painting your light
in black...